15/02/2024
HAPPY BELATED VALENTINES DAY LADIES,
Mumewachiliwa ama bado!?
So,
Maybe you’re dating a guy or rather just started seeing a guy, he’s a masculine man who likes to take charge, and yet he’s not stepping up “as much” as you would like.
He’s not leading, planning, and making dates with you as often as you would like.
So you may be wondering:
Is this just who he is?
Is he incapable of fulfilling my needs?
Is this a need I can “let go off”? Or are we just incompatible and this just isn’t going to work long term?
When a man doesn’t quite “meeting your expectations” what do you do?
I think there is a more IMPORTANT question to answer first:
How is the OVERALL health of your relationship?
Are you emotionally connecting in other ways?
Are you having deeper, more fulfilling conversations?
Are you setting aside quality time to spend together?
When you raise an issue, does he listen and make you feel heard and seen?
Are you still keeping the romance alive? (eg. regular and sweet hugs, kisses, “I love yous” etc?)
Do you feel he genuinely loves and cares about you?
In general.. on a scale of 1-10 how content do you feel in your relationship?
Because if your relationship is about an 8 or a 9, in terms of satisfaction levels, then why are you choosing to focus on the 1-2 areas of the relationship that ISN’T yet perfect?
Now…
If you scored yourself lower than 7 or 8, you need to get real with yourself for a minute.
What do you believe is missing? And are you taking responsibility on YOUR END to make those things happen?
Women can be such badasses in their careers, but when it comes to their relationship, they can suddenly forget they have any power.
Don’t sit and wait around for a man to do something that YOU could do yourself.
Don’t push all of that responsibility onto him to do.
Especially when you’re the one who is feeling unhappy about it.
This is not “chasing”, this is not “not being feminine”, this is you taking responsibility for the health of your relationship.
I say this with caution, because some of you will take it too far.
But provided you stay connected with yourself, and you take responsibility for your relationship (not just delegate it to him), you will know when a relationship works or not.
yours truly
Madge!
Dont hesitate to contact me for any of your property queries. Na ulete huyo mbaba nimadvice vile atakuinvestia!
