07/29/2026
https://www.homes.com/property/7746-16th-st-nw-washington-dc/t65y2clqe15s6/?l=53hb36z2g1pwh
Last night, in the latest chapter of my real estate life, a local wanderer thought the fastest way to acquire a multi-million-dollar estate was to simply treat a $2 million listing like a walk-in closet — in a neighborhood full of Ring cameras and observant neighbors.
The seller had called because the man, who had attempted to get into the house twice this week, was back. As if "Checking If the Back Door is Unlocked" wasn't raising enough red flags.
The aspiring homeowner showed up carrying zero dollars, zero verified financing, and a driver's license that put him straight into the local police department's active warrant file.
According to witnesses, the suspect was casually hanging out at the nearby bus stop debating real estate strategy with the local physician, right before police cruisers rolled up with flashing lights.
Again, as I have often had in this brutal real estate market, I started to rethink my life choices, namely my real estate career,
What else could possibly happen - the seller had already gotten three green vacant house stickers since March because some well-meaning busybody went around the neighborhood and reported "vacant" houses, as soon as the for sale sign went up.
Other than working with the tax liens investors, who walk away with hundreds of thousands in DC resident’s equity at the annual tax lien sale, what neighbor would report a renovated home on the market as "vacant," which would increase the homeowner's taxes by 5 times unless they are able to navigate D.C.’s Byzantine vacant and/or blighted exemption process?
For three days, this guy had been visiting the front, back and side doors of the house trying to get in, based on the photos from the ring camera the seller had sent me. I asked his name to see if he was my buyer with the $4 million preapproval.
I'm Debo, he replied, with an accent. The police officer shooed me away, I was not an investigating officer by the way.
Standing there astonished was Ayanna, the doctor who lived next door with her husband and three children. She was attempting to show her rising middle school daughter how to ride the bus to camp the next day (impressive, since I knew parents whose children never rode the bus or metro before 18). But Ayanna is a Philly girl and she was determined to guide her children to self-sufficiency. She's the type of neighbor who wouldn't snob the perp, and is why prior to the police presence, she was having a lovely conversation with the suspect, who was also at the bus stop.
I quickly update her. Though it would appear that while we had not sold this completely renovated house that had been on the market since last July, at least we had one interested fella.
I caught her up on who I thought the intruder was - the soon to be millionaire homeowner who had spotted the house of his dreams as he rode the bus to his home - the shelter for the unhoused (let's be politically correct) in nearby Silver Spring, MD.
He had called earlier - insisting he had a preapproval for $4 million. I had even stopped by the Columbia Heights branch of Bank of America to verify the "preapproval," which had to be a settlement because to get a preapproval, you need income and I would think not be unhoused. I don't judge - he could have gotten a settlement, at least.
Anyway, after the $4 million man volunteered that he had previously lived in the house that was the former Congolese embassy at 16th and Colorado, I called the present owner, who owns a fab Indian restaurant in NOMA, who insisted that he had bought the house directly from the Congolese embassy. I pressed again - and that's when he remembered that there was a squatter who he had to take to court to get him removed. That did it for me, no need to meet with this buyer, who it turns out may not be last night's intruder after all.
Back to Ayanna. After I relayed that story to her - by this time sitting on her front porch - the police officer walked over and congratulated me on helping to catch a fugitive - who had an outstanding warrant in Maryland. And he lived nearby, according to his driver's license.
They would not verify the name but this could not be my buyer with the $4 million preapproval or settlement - he didn't have an accent and he didn't live in the neighborhood.
This was a whole new fella - who also wanted the house. He was not attempting to break in, he told the officers, but the open house sign on the rear left over from the previous open house made him believe that the house was "open."
They took him away. But somewhere out there is a homeless guy, whose phone is turned off, who wants to buy this multi-millionaire dollar home.
If you want to see what the fuss is all about, stop by Sunday, Aug. 2, 2026 2-4 pm, 7746 16th St NW, Washington DC, because this time there will be an open house.
Listed for sale at $1999900. This Rock Creek Luxe Manor, at 7,277 square feet, is believed to be one of the largest home in Colonial Village. It is j...
