31/05/2026
Sunday Reflection — Still Becoming
From the very beginning — at least the beginning I can remember — I’ve been becoming the person I am today.
I’ve always lived life with a sense of urgency. As a youngin’, it showed up as restlessness — wanting everything yesterday instead of tomorrow. I was always in a hurry to arrive somewhere, even if I didn’t yet know exactly where that was.
Looking back, maybe I was chasing independence. Maybe identity. Maybe I simply wanted to prove to myself that I could build a life of my own choosing.
A memory from the summer before I turned twelve comes to mind.
A family friend invited me to travel to London, then up through the English countryside to Glasgow to visit her daughter. The moment I heard about the opportunity, I wanted it desperately. But I didn’t want to depend on anyone else to make it happen.
So I bought a lawnmower and spent the summer cutting grass in the Florida heat. By the end of it, I’d saved $2,200 and paid my own way.
Even then, I was chasing independence.
In my late teens and early twenties, that same energy carried me into real estate. At eighteen, I found my first property. Until the deal closed, I could hardly sit still. Before one project was finished, I was already searching for the next one.
Then came Costa Rica.
By my early thirties, after my first trip here, I knew life was shifting again. That same restless pull — the one that had followed me since childhood — pushed me toward a different country, a different rhythm, a different version of myself.
And somehow, now in my fifties, that feeling still remains.
Not anxiety. Not dissatisfaction. Something else.
A quiet understanding that life is still unfolding.
I still feel the urge to live fully, to experience deeply, to keep growing into myself. Maybe even more now, because time feels more valuable than it once did. But age changes the texture of urgency. You begin valuing your days differently. Your tolerance for the meaningless thins out. You become more protective of your peace, your energy, your time.
And maybe that’s one of the gifts of getting older.
You eventually realize you never fully arrive.
You don't stop becoming.
Somewhere along the way you start being.
And at the end of the day, I can say — I’m just so proud to be here.