28/07/2024
Sharon
A Afternoon sleeps Before I went to school, Mum would routinely have an afternoon sleep. She was 39 when she had me, and two children were still living at home, so I guess she got tired. I remember not being able to sleep beside her, so I got up and decided I should play with my budgie. Upon getting it out, the cat pounced on it and took it under the house to eat. It sounded as though it was right under Mums bedroom! She was not impressed… and I was left crying and feeling so guilty.
B Bowls By the time I arrived on the scene she and Dad were very much into their Indoor and Outdoor bowls. I’d often be babysat (School age) by Glenna and Brian Clark, yet more good friends of Mum and Dad
Broom I remember her standing at the porch entrance yelling to the boys who’d run off after doing any number of “lovely” things and saying “they’ll have to come back sometime”… I guess they got their come-uppance??
C Cook She was a good cook – Madeira cake, Cream Puffs and shortbread. Brian Airey perfected them in honour of her.
Cards I remember going up to the local ’Pavilion” where the locals gathered to play cards
D Dad Dads real love was Mum. He would sit and stare into nothingness.
Dancing They used to look so awesome together when dancing
E End of hospitalisation When she came out of Auckland Hospital after her operation to remove the cancer that was pushing up on her brain, Dad played the song “Welcome Home” by Peters and Lee and they cuddled on the couch.
Eddie He was away working by the time I arrived on the scene, yet I’d always get something from him for my birthday….I never did ask him, but I suspect she either hit him up for the money or just brought me something and said it was from him. I distinctly remember a can of spaghetti one year as kit was my favourite
F Friends Two of her best friends live close by. Irene Foote who was married to Mick, lived on the farm behind us - their children were Ngaire, Eddie and Kiri’s age group, I think. And Velma Harris was the other very good friend of Mum. The Harris’s lived further down what we called Ngarua Rd which is now called Kaihere Rd. Their children were around Philip, Deny & my age. Velma’s youngest, Brett and I, were great friends – we both had small dogs whom accompanied us everywhere.
Forgetful She’d go in to a shop, buy something and either leave her purse or the item purchased behind
G The Girls She got on well with Dad’s sister Aunty Maggie Murray and we were often at Kopu
Gambling?? Every Monday was cards day at nanas – Aunty Jean, Patsy Dye, June Fraei I remember were of ten there. They gambled using matches as their $$$. Hats where I’d hear…” You kids get outside” the most. We’d play around the coal and wood, in Nanas flower and vege garden of which she was very good at!!
H Harmony Mum and Dad sang duos at local dances Who harmonised who
Harmony Club Mum, Dad and a few local ran this club teaching the young folk how to dance waltz, Fox trots, Valita?... and my favourite – the maxina!
Hair She’d always rinse my hair with vinegar in the water to make it shine – we did that with our calf club calves toto.
I Incidents Whenever there was an incident when I’d behaved badly enough to warrant a “smack” her face would change to a screwed-up kind of sour lemon facial as she smacked my fingers
Iodine She used to have to paint Kiri with Iodine when he was sick with rheumatic fever
J Jam When she needed a break from my incessant questions, shed spread some plum jam on a piece of bread and send me to sit in the corner of the kitchen with a saucer of cream to dip the bread…..and shut me up! LOL
K Kisses Always shared lots of kisses
L Lullabies Na nani nani na nani nani nani na nani nani nani na nani nani nani na
Moe moe taku pepe moe moe ra moe moe taku pepe moe moe ra
M Motherly She was Motherly, love, happy, smiling and warm - pretty special really
Mountain bike When we got one Dad doubled Mum on the back of it around our front lawn – she had a huge smile on her face!
N Nana Mum was very close to nana, she often stayed at our house. Nana was the one who would teach me basic reo Maori. Who said “Haere ra” and who said “E noho ra”
O Oven She cooked heaps in the Coal range oven- everything seemed to taste better from there
P Phone I remember her talking on the phone before school and needing to do my hair with the dreaded rubber band – she’d tie the hair on top of my head with a rubber band and frame it into an umbrella type ponytail!! It hurt like hell to get it out! We had the brown wooden oblong, phones that were attached to the wall. NO walking around chatting for Mum.
Pillows She needed at pillow at her back and one to sit on to drive the car and reach the peddles.
Pirau corn Probably the only time she had the house to herself for a considerable amount of time was when she cooked ‘pirau’ fermented corn. She LOVED it! I don’t know whether anyone else in the family ever ate it but I could never ger passed the smell to ever sample it
Q Quiet I remember Uncle Richard Murray saying that Mum was normally a quiet woman but once she got angry…. Look out! She was like a mother bear protecting her cubs.
R Roma Her “Pakeha” name/equivalent… transliteration
S Squat she used to put her feet on the toilet seat and then squat on that. I guess it was because she was used to the old long drop and the need to be aware of all the creepy crawlies!!
Smile She had a beautiful smile – it made her whole face light up
T Te Reo Maori Mum was brought up in a household that te reo Maori was her first language. You can image her surprise when she attended school and she wasn’t allowed to speak it…anywhere within the school jurisdiction! In her day unfortunately, boys even got the strap for that!!! Just imagine how rich our lives would’ve been with the taonga of Te Reo Maori as part of our everyday lives? Mum, Nana, and all lour tupuna would be so proud of how far we’ve come… yes, there’s plenty more to work to do but we’ll get there! So, as an adult she didn’t speak much at all but her comprehension was still there, so that was something at least!!
‘Tew’ Ellen and Bob Tew lived next door. I often jumped the fence to visit them and they got a TV when it first came out and we’d watch from our front veranda. I got the feeling she would try to boss Mum around
U Ukulele She played it well. I especially loved the fast strum to the island songs. I still haven’t perfected that. She taught me to play “Shanty Town” with all its fancy chords. She played by ear
V Vehicle I went with Kiri to the store up the road to get some bread. I sat beside him, and placed the bread beside me to the door. When he turned the car around to go home, the door opened and out went the bread…... and me. I got a tiny cut on my forehead (which bled like a stuck pig) , ….and Kiri got a big telling off from Mum.
W Whanau We were super important to Mum – she wasn’t the socialite, that was Dad’s domain. She kept the home fires burning and made sure we were well fed.
Welfare kids It seemed that j ust as her kids started leaving home we began having welfare kids stay with us. I guess that was the beginning of my being interested in social injustices.
X Xmas Always had a hangi at our place and the cousins and often neighbours would join us. There’d be laughter while preparing food and songs and laughter afterward. I remember helping peel a whole sack of spuds with Carol Cullen. Raymonds wife
Y Young She will be forever young being only 54 when she passed. I think all her siblings – Korekoreko (Kora Barakat), Tairiri (Lily O’Brien) except Aunty Tiniwai (Jean Cullen) also died reasonably young. Her only brother Uncle Kiri was only 17! Poor Nana outlived 2 husbands and 4 out of 5 children!!
Z zzzz Mum snored, kinda like a purr, just like Ngaire does LOL
No reira, ka mau te wehi toku mama, Moe mai, moe mai ra
I didn’t realise until I was working through this exercise just how much I still miss Mum and how fresh it still feels. Having said that I feel so honoured to be part of this whanau and am sure that Mum would be so proud of each and every one of us
Sharon xo
