27/12/2021
"Workaholics need new priorities"
Workaholics have been called "the stereotype of modern life". Though not many people will admit to being Workaholics, they are found in all job categories. When ones devotion to career becomes exaggerated, both the worker and his or her family suffer. Richard is one of the few businessmen we know who acknowledges his roller-coaster ride from being a chronic Workaholics to finding balance in his priorities. He tells his story:
After finishing college in three years, I immediately started a business that required eighty-hour work weeks. I was in debt big time and stressed to the max. My wife felt abandoned and lonely in a new town with no friends. No money and no husband to spend time with her.
Within a few years, I realized I might lose my marriage if I didn't cut back, so I sold the business. But two years later, I started another business and fell back into the same rut of long hours and high stress, a cycle I repeated several times. Like a drug addiction needing to be fed, my desire to be as successful as possible drove me to continue my quest for more.
When I had any spare time, I poured it into my church life. Before long, I was working less at the office but volunteering more at church. I tried to achieve balance but always got pulled back into over committing and overworking. I excused my behavior, reasoning that I was a hardworking Christian achieving worldly success while balancing my service at church.
I now realize I was striving to win the approval of my parents, friends and peers. Sadly, I was blind to the effect my behavior was having on my marriage and family, I did achieve what I set out to do for my family financially, and we reached a high standard of living----but at what cost? My wife would have preferred me to provide less financial success and more quality time for her and our children.
I'm not sure where we would be today had I not had near-death experience while on a missions trip overseas. While lying with pneumonia in a dirty hospital in a third world country, my life flashed before me. Acknowledging that much of what I was working for was self-centered and insignificant to God, I promised I'd change things if he let me live. Due to several miracles in answer to prayer, I did live, and I did modify my lifestyle.
I sold business, cut my work schedule, reduced my number of employees by 90 percent and kept only one one small family business. However, with all the newfound free time, I again got pulled into working too much at church and even went on staff full-time. I seemed to know only one speed-----overdrive. This led to a repeat of all the things I was trying to escape, but again I used the excuse that I was doing it for God.
A few years of this affected my health, and I realized my "modifications" were not enough. Determined to change, I took off a few months to seek the Lord for this direction. Because of my tendency to overdo and overwork, I now refuse to say yes to requests without running them by my wife and getting her counsel. I can't say I have achieved perfection, but I'm making great progress.
Having drive and working hard for your family are good in themselves, but anything taken to extreme is dangerous. We can't see our blind spots-----which is why they're called blind spots. And we're not good at judging for ourselves whether or not we have a well-balanced approach to work. We need to listen to family member and loved-ones, then trust God to help us make wise decisions. Now that I'm at a better place of balance, I don't ever want to go back to where I was.
Today Richard is deeply involved in church missions projects that take him around the world. He has sold a major interest in his business to his son and tries to let him manage it without interference. He still works at the large city church where he was a founding elder, but he keeps limited hours. His favorite pastime is babysitting his grandchildren and enjoying time with then and his wife.
