10/02/2024
"I was married before, but that partner was not around, didn’t participate in childcare—anything—so it was like I was already a single mother with a roommate. Then, going from being married to going through the divorce process—that was hard. Doing a divorce when you have no job, no idea of what you're going to do, is really hard, especially in the middle of nursing school, which is already one of the most stressful things you could do.
Having to move back in with my parents, move back in with my dad first, get kicked out of his house, then move in with my mom, just added to the stress. But I was always like, "I’m not gonna show my daughter that we're struggling or anything," so I would still take her out—for a coffee date or a sushi date, whatever—even though my bank account didn’t want it. She had no idea what we were going through, and I feel like I was really good at hiding that.
But then, to come out on the other side—buying a house on my own, getting married, starting our own family and everything—well, it just ended up being better.
It was just about being able to keep things as normal as possible for her. I didn’t want her to see that I could've used some help because I didn’t want her to feel bad or think, "I want to help." Anytime we went to the store, and she’d be like, "Can I get this toy? Can I get that toy?"—I wanted to get her stuff, but I had to say, "Oh, no, maybe next time." I always put that off, and I feel like that’s why I spoil her now. It’s like, "I can afford it now, so sure, get it."
Maybe it was because of that, but now I feel like all the toys are redemption toys. The biggest thing for me was buying her her first big girl bed. At first, I had no money, no nothing, and being able to buy her a bed, let her pick out all her bedding and everything—that was the best feeling ever. And buying a house for us—that was major. First I bought her a bed, and then I was able to step up: paying off my car, and then my house—a beautiful house at that. I let her decorate her room however she wanted, pick out whatever toys and clothes she wanted, and that’s such a good feeling for me."
Brought to by The Burrow Cafe & Billy Nguyen Real Estate