03/24/2026
Thereâs something about floating in the Rio Grande running through the Santa Elena Canyonâstaring up at a cloudless skyâthat caught me off guard.
At first, it was panic. Trying to trust my body to float, ears underwater, everything going quiet. It was just me⌠with me. And being with myself isnât always comfortable.
Then something shifted. The quiet stopped feeling loud. I felt how helpless I was floating out thereâand instead of that being overwhelming, it felt grounding. I remember thinking how grateful I was just to be in my body, in that moment, allowing myself to experience the normal roller coaster of emotions being human.
This experience & whole roadtrip to Big Bend reminded me of the time when my truck was my home. I thought I was chasing freedom. & I wasâbut I didnât expect how uncomfortable it would be. Days without speaking to another person. Missing shared experiences with loved ones. Questioning myself constantly.
Most days looked like picking a direction, driving with the windows down, music blasting, pulling over somewhere random to jump in a body of water, hiking until I was tired, cooking on the back of my truck, exploring towns, cities, forests, deserts, falling asleep under the stars & waking up to the sun rising. My dream life at the time.
And stillâevery dayâI wondered if I was doing it wrong. If I was falling behind. If I was missing out.
I had to accept that life keeps moving with or without youâand that doesnât mean youâre losing.
If youâre in a season where nothing fully makes sense yet⌠where youâre figuring it out as you go, doing things other people donât getâchoose yourself.
Not when itâs easy. Not when itâs validated. Now. Even if itâs uncomfortable. Even if itâs questionedâEspecially then. Invest in yourself today.