05/13/2015
Sooo this post is going to be RAW & UNFILTERED and I've decided I am just going to speak from my heart and see where it ends up!! I'm not sure where even to begin, but as I type this I try and hold back the tears and let my heart do the talking!!!
I want to start off by saying that I am sorry that I have been incognito & pretty much fallen off the face of the earth the last 6 months. It's been a rough road recently....emotionally, mentally, physically....and everyday it's been an ongoing struggle for me to be able to find my center and inspiring state of mind that is usually HK!! Everything I do in life, I always strive to do it with every ounce of energy & passion I have! I feel EVERYTHING, from the tips of my toes...to the top of my head! I am an overly sensitive, overly emotional artist that is constantly trying to channel the over flow of thoughts/feelings that I try and let shine thru in my work...and over the course of the last 6 months I truly lost what made me me!! I LOST A LOVE THAT INSPIRED ME EVERYDAY, A LOVE THAT WAS MY MUSE. I lost a sense of purpose of who I was as an individual and as an artist...because when I felt I lost the thing that made me the happiest and inspired me to be a better person... I felt like I truly lost the sense of everything around me as well...and I didn't know what I had left that made me happy anymore!! Everything was falling apart around me in my personal life & relationship, my dad's health started deteriorating day by day, as well as my family was struggling with the demons of ADDICTION....but most of all MY BUSINESS!!! There were some days I couldn't get out of bed, days I would just lay there and cry and cry wondering when I was going to feel whole again!! I struggled with DEPRESSION & ANXIETY everyday that was crippling...I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I couldn't stop thinking about the ONE THING that made me INSPIRIRED IN THIS WORLD TO SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE....and it seemed WHEN I LOST MY PARTNER, I FELT LIKE I LOST MY WORLD!! Creating beautiful photographs is what I was put on this earth to do, but when I struggled finding the beauty in my own life...it was hard for me to give 130% into my business & finding the VISION TO CREATE this BEAUTIFUL ART that started to become HK Photography the last couple years!!! When my family then started falling upon rough times, it was hard to keep it together for the strength of them!! To watch my dad not even be able to walk or enjoy any quality of life truly was heartbreaking! I couldn't turn off the pain, and all I wanted everything to go away!! I wanted my life back, my love back, my dad back, my brother back, and my mom & sister back! I wanted everything back that made me who I was, and when I felt like I was losing everything around me...I lost the inspiration to create beautiful ART.
I just want to MOST OF ALL APOLOGIZE & THANK MY CLIENTS from the bottom of my heart for sticking by my side thru-out the last 6 months. It was truly hard for me everyday to wake up knowing how far behind with editing and my business I was, and try to find the PASSION & INSPIRATION to put my HEART & SOUL into every photo that made me HK. I have upset many of you, and for that I AM TRULY SORRY!! NO WORDS OR FEELINGS CAN EVER RECTIFY how incredibly guilty & sorry I AM...but I just wanted to take this time to THANK YOU for being such kind-hearted & understanding & AMAZING people!! I know that there has been countless instances where I have upset a lot of you, and for that I am sorry!! ALL I WANT TO EVER DO IS MAKE EVERYONE ELSE HAPPY, and when I lost that within myself I started slowly disappointing everyone around me and my CLIENTS & FRIENDS & FAMILY MEAN MORE TO ME THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN THIS WORLD!!! So please know that I am doing everything I CAN TO GET EVERYTHING TO YOU ASAP and NO APOLOGIES OR WORDS COULD EVER DESCRIBE MY ETERNAL GREATNESS & GRATITUDE for being so UNDERSTANDING & AMAZING!!! I also want to take the time to apologize to my friends, my family, Brandon and anyone else the last 6 months that I ever disappointed or let down and from all my CRAZINESS!! I LOVE YOU ALL AND THANK YOU AGAIN FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART and I hope that one day everyone I ever hurt, upset, or disappointed the last 6 months will find it in their hearts to give me a second chance and prove myself once again!
LASTLY : HERE IS THE FIRST INTERVIEW I HAVE EVER DONE!!! A HUGE HUGE SHOUT OUT TO MIKE BROWN & JEFF GRUBICH for asking me to be apart of this FABULOUS EXPERIENCE at Illinois Valley small talk!! I literally was soooooo nervous about this interview because most of my experiences I just speak from the heart and I have no filter and I was worried about cussing too much...BUT MOM & DAD YOU WOULD BE PROUD I DIDINT CUSS ONCE wink emoticon haha But honestly this was the first time I kinda came back into the PUBLIC after hibernating away in my house all year....so I JUST WANT TO GIVE MUCH MUCH LOVE TO MIKE & JEFF for being SOOOO AMAZING and letting me be apart of such a fun & lighthearted day!! YOU GUYS ROCK!!
Sooooooo without out further ado ((( DRUM ROLL)) CHECK OUT Illinois Valley Small Talk with HK Photography :) :) :)
PS- Once again MUCH MUCH LOVE TO ALL MY CLIENTS, MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS, MY SUPPORTERS, MY HATERS, MY BELIEVERS, and EVERYONE WHO'S NEVER GIVEN UP ON ME! I WILL FOREVER BE GRATEFUL FOR THE AMAZING PEOPLE I AM BLESSED TO BE SURROUNDED BY...thank you for all of you because without YOU I truly wouldn't be who I am today!! MUCH MUCH LOVE FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
Welcome to IV small talk! This week Mike Brown and Jeff Grubich welcome Heather Kaszynski on the show! Heather is well seasoned in photography for special occasions, family portraits...you name it. She tells us how she got interested in photograp...
