10/20/2026
I replay small talk like game film. Every awkward pause, in slow motion. Ask me how I know. π
That small talk went better than you think.
Here's the wow. Researchers paired up strangers for a short chat. Afterward, each person guessed how much the other one liked them. On average, they guessed too low. The researchers call it the liking gap.
It kept showing up. In a lab. With college dorm mates, for most of the school year. With grown adults at workshops on how to talk to strangers.
Here's the plot twist. People watching videos of the chats could see how much the partners liked each other. The people doing the talking missed it. The researchers think their own harsh replay got in the way.
I meet new people for a living. You'd think I'd have quit grading my own small talk by now. I'm still practicing.
This week's play with one neighbor (learned the hard way):
π’ Wave, say hi, and learn their name
π‘ Ask one easy question: How long have you lived here?
π Assume it went better than you think, and go back for round two
Trick or treat night is a free icebreaker. Worst case, you learn a name. Best case, you make a friend on your street. That's how a house turns into a home. π‘
Which step are you trying this week: 1, 2, or 3? π
1 Wave and say hi
2 Ask one easy question
3 Go back for round two
Dumb things J.R. has done so others don't have to. π
J.R. McGee Real Estate Team | eXp Realty of California | DRE 02022857