05/14/2023
A mother’s love is the purest example of love that we can find on this earth. Is it perfect? By no means. Why? Because we as mothers are not perfect. As I reflect today on being a mother, I know I’ve been far from perfect. I did some things right and I made some mistakes. Do I have regrets? Yes. There have been times when I felt that Motherhood was just one big guilt trip. I’ve questioned myself, “Did I do a good job? Did I work too many hours? Was I emotionally present? Was I enough?” But then I am reminded that the only thing I could have done was my best and I must admit that some days my best was better than others.
Unfortunately, life doesn't come with a manual, it comes with a mother. And as hard as I have tried to be a perfect Mother and do everything and be everything, I thought my children needed; I have fallen short. Not because I did not try and give it my best, and certainly not because I didn’t love my children enough, but because I am human.
I realize I’ve had it all wrong. God did not put us here as Mother’s to master unconditional love. Only God’s love is unconditional love, and it is where we all came from and where we will return. God created us perfectly imperfect. If he wanted us to be perfect, He would have created us that way. Instead, He put us as Mothers, Sons, and Daughters here to learn: Personal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love, Broken love, and Whole love.
Love through the grace of stumbling. Demonstrated through the beauty of messing up. I have all too often thought I was put here to be perfect. But I realize now that we all came here to be gorgeously human, flawed, and fabulous and perfectly imperfect!
Love doesn't require the condition of perfection. It only asks that we show up. And do our best. That we stay present and feel fully. That we shine and fly and laugh and cry and hurt and heal and fall and get back up and play and work and live and die as our authentic selves!
Life is a perfectly planned progression of lessons. We will find ourselves with certain people in love, family, friendships, and work, when we need to be with them. Our past is neither an accident nor a mistake. We have been where we needed to be, with the necessary people. We can embrace our history, with the pain, its imperfections, its mistakes, its resentments and even its tragedies.
Today let us let go of the guilt and fear about our past and present circumstances. Let us trust God that where we have been and where we are today is right where we need to be. Our present circumstances are exactly as they need to be – for now.
As Mothers, Daughters, and Sons, we must clear our minds of the expectations and residue of the past and clear our minds of the fears of tomorrow. We can choose today to be present now. To learn from our mistakes. We can make ourselves available in this moment, on this day. It is by being fully present now that we reach the fullness of tomorrow. We must stop acting like life is a rehearsal and live this day as if it were our last because today is tomorrow’s memories.
Today let us release our human mothers from being the sole source of our need for perfect love and open out eyes and see what she was able to give. Let us find gratitude for that, even if it is just the tiniest seed. And then choose to release yourself and her from the unrealistic expectations that even the greatest mother cannot live up to.
The present moment is all we have. That’s why it’s called the “present”. It is a gift. Yes, we have plans and goals, and a vision for tomorrow, but now is the only time we possess, and it is enough.
The only perfect love is God’s love. It is a love that awakens our souls and causes us to reach for more. It plants a fire within our hearts and is the only thing that can bring us peace. It is a love that we can fall into when we are hurting, uncertain, and feeling like we can’t handle the circumstances in our lives any longer. It’s a love we can retreat into, feel held by, move through our deepest fears with. It’s a love we can sink into and cry our hearts out until there are no more tears left, and then wipe off our face, take a deep breath and suddenly feel the courage within that same heart to stand up tall and meet the world stronger.
If we are living and showing up for life, we will at times feel stretched past our limits and fear will come up. Even if we have the most amazing friends and partner, there are still places within us that their love can’t get to. Only God’s love can reach those deeper places in our hearts where the loneliness, fear, doubt, feelings of not belonging, not being enough, not knowing how to live or what to do next. It’s this kind of love that we need and never outgrow. Michele~
