10/01/2023
October. Domestic Violence Awareness Month. A month that I admittedly was never very aware of since I had managed to dodge being any of the 1 in 4 people who experience it. Lucky me. I had thought that was a direct correlation to who I am, the strength I have inside me, and my non existent patience and complete disdain for as****es. Maybe that misconception is one of the key points we should all actually be aware of when it comes to Domestic Violence. Abusers come in all shapes and sizes, all different modes of abuse, and many do not walk the streets being overtly obvious of the tendencies they have behind closed doors. Many are highly intelligent, masters at manipulation, charming and successful. The targets of their abuse do not fit the narrative most people tell themselves either. The people they target do not start out weak, dependent, subservient, fragile and scared sh*tless. In fact, it is part of the challenge for the most narcissistic and sociopathic of abusers to find the strongest, most capable and independent of targets and break them down into mere memories of their former selves. And contrary to popular belief held by most people who have never experienced this - once the targets understand the level and extent of the abuse that engulfs their relationship, it is still not easy to just up and walk away. The mind f**k is real. And the pain it causes is deep. And the threats which the target lives under daily are paralyzing. The more control your abuser has managed to extract from you, the harder the proverbial rug can be pulled out from right underneath you, and the farther you feel like you will fall without them.I don't know if I was aware of these things earlier on if that would have stopped me from becoming a statistic. I don't know if I understood the various levels and extent of abuse more deeply, if anything would have turned out different. What I do know is that if anything I can say to anyone who will listen will give them the clarity to see the truth through the gaslighting and find the strength through the debilitating pain, then my experiences were not for nothing. They were for something. 💜💜 Repost from 2021. Every word is still real.